Listen, Bread, You’re Toast.

by Stephanie

“We need to talk. “


Let’s be honest. It is a sentence no person wants to hear. For me, it usually results in the discovery of yet another secret relative, but that’s a story for another day.


For a lot of people, “We need to talk” is followed immediately by “Things are just not working out.” Nobody wants to be on either side of that conversation, but it is very difficult to end a long relationship, one so very comfortable that you can hardly imagine a life without it, despite its toxicity. It usually starts with a nagging feeling of dissatisfaction, and you start to think, maybe there is something better out there, a happier existence than your current state of affairs. You think to yourself, “Maybe I just need some space.” So you back off, and limit contact, but soon, one concession leads to another until you are right back where you started again only this time you are vaguely aware of what life might be like on the other side. The vicious cycle continues


Your friends try to warn you:

“This is no good for you!”

“You deserve better!”

“Why are you being an idiot!??”


But to no avail. It’s probably just easier to keep chugging along in your meager existence than to take the plunge in a new direction. Just keep taking the metaphorical hits; at least you know where they’re coming from. Soon, you start reminiscing about the good days, memories just fond enough to keep you in orbit, while gradually, your unhealthy relationship grows like a cancer until you simply can’t stand it anymore. You get up the courage to take a stand and move on!

Now the only thing standing in the way of you and independent freedom is “The Talk”


Ok. I think I might be ready.


Listen, Gluten, we need to talk.